Critter Stories · Farmtastic Stories

Patience Is the Name of the Game

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I often feel like God teaches us great lessons through our critters.  One of them is to be in the moment, which is inherently hard for me as my brain is constantly on the go (just ask Cowboy).  And the second most frequently needed lesson around the farm is patience, as it just makes everything run more smoothly. Now my mama always said, “Never pray for patience, because you never know what you are going to get to teach you that one.”

However, God always finds a way to teach us whatever it is we need to be taught.  Enter our dear donkeys, Mama Rose and her baby, Sweetie Pie.  When they arrived four years ago, we had no idea what we were in for.

From the start, Sweetie Pie lived up to her name.  That donkey thinks she is a dog.  She loves people.  Everyone who comes to the farm hugs on Sweetie Pie, and she inevitably ends up with her pic posted all over Facebook.  She’s even been known to chase a car or two down the driveway.  I often think she’d just climb right in and sit down with you if you let her.  Mama Rose – not so much.

When our friends brought us the donkeys, they had let us know that Mama was stand-offish.  However, they hadn’t had the pair long and hoped that with constant care she would follow Sweetie’s lead.  Mama would take carrots out of your hand, but that was it.  If you moved too fast or didn’t’ have food, forget it.

Well this fall with Sweetie Pie’s hoof injuries, we were forced to keep her up several times.  And this pair can’t be separated, so where Sweetie goes, Mama goes.  Every time we would enter the stall, Mama would run away as if we were out to eat her, although with the confines of the stall this was a humorous jaunt.  We’d simply let her do her thing, running around like a crazy.  And the usual refrain around feeding time was always, “Oh, Mama!”

One night at dusk, I was  hanging out in the stall just enjoying the night air, and low and behold Mama Rose started to approach me.  I stayed perfectly still and held out my hand.  Could this be the moment? She started sniffing, no doubt hoping I had a carrot.  My fingers tickled her nose, and she started trying to nibble my hand.  Not unusual, but this is as far as it usually goes.  Once she’s certain there are no goodies, she’s usually done with me.

But somehow that night was different. I kept playing with her and working my way up her nose.  She took it.  And when I’d take my hand away, she’d take one step closer.  On my goodness, she actually wanted to be touched.  I wanted to scream out with joy, but clearly that would have ended our encounter in two seconds flat.

I could see Cowboy watching and smiling in the distance, and I mouthed, “Look at me. I’m petting Mama Rose!!!”

After four years, I was finally touching Mama’s head for the first time.  I was actually rubbing her fuzzy forehead!  Honestly, I had long ago given up hope that Mama and I would be any more than feed buddies, but as I said, God has a way of teaching us things.  There is always hope.  Things that seem as if they will be that way forever can change.

So exciting – I was actually able to pet her neck and feel her beautiful mane.
Mama didn’t put Sweetie in the middle this time. Instead, Sweetie was jealous and inserted herself. Farm problems!
Look at the furry head. I just love it!

This reminds me of one of my favorite Bible verses:

6) Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, and with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7)And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:6-7 (NIV)

So we continue to learn our lessons from our four-legged friends.  And I love this lesson.  Give up the anxious, and bring on the grateful.  Mama and I continue to work on our friendship daily.  She loves her morning scratches.

Farmtastic Recipes

Farmtastic Recipe – Roasted Vegetables and Wild Rice

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I’m always in search of great side dishes, something to shake Cowboy and I out of our potato-and-grean-bean rut.  This recipe has some of my favorite veggies, which when combined with wild rice make the perfect mate to grilled chicken, pork, or steak. This is a one-and-done side dish, meaning simply add your protein and you are good to go.  While it takes 40 minutes to cook, that gives you plenty of time for the rest of dinner prep and clean up.

Here are my notes on this all-in-one side dish.

The Recipe: Roasted Vegetables and Wild Rice

The Source: Southern Living and My Recipes (click here for the official recipe)

Farmtastic Notes:

  • I altered this recipe in order to make just enough for four people as a side dish.
  • For the rice, I used Uncle Ben’s Wild Rice Original Recipe, one 6 ounce box.
  • For the veggies, I used 1 red bell pepper, 1 zucchini, 1 yellow squash, and 1/2 medium white onion.  All chopped into bite-size chunks.
  • For the nuts, I used a heaping 1/4 cup of raw slivered almonds.  I’ve used up to 1/3 of a cut, depending on what you like. I did not roast them or add more salt to them.
  • For the olive oil, I used extra virgin.  I mean, really, is there any other kind?
  • For the seasoning salt, the rice comes with it’s own spice mix, so you might want to reduce the seasoning salt to 1 1/2  to 2 tsps., depending on your preference.  This will keep it from being too salty when you add the veggies to the rice.
  • For the pepper, I never measure. I just get my grinder out and eyeball it.
  • When roasting the veggies, heap them onto the cookie sheet.  If they are in too thin of a layer, they will burn.  I like to mound them (see photo).  Also, on their second set of 20 minutes in the oven, keep an eye on them.  They can start to char, and sometimes 15 minutes will do you.
  • You’ll want to start cooking your rice after the veggies go in the oven.  It takes about 25 to 30 minutes to cook down.
  • Finally, this dish is not only delish, but it’s super colorful, so it’s great for company when you want to dress things up and have your guests say, “Yummy!”

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I’d love to hear what you think of this recipe, so give it a try and share your thoughts.

Adventures Away From the Farm · Farmtastic Stories

Fall-abulous

My Farmtastic Life2 Comments

To quote L.M. Montgomery, author of one of my favorite books, Ann of Green Gables, “I’m so glad I live in a world where there are Octobers.” And here in north central Texas, that means that festival season is in full swing.  With a reprise from the heat, blue skies overhead, and a cool breeze in the air, our wacky and wonderful small towns put on their best show-and-tell in celebration of fall.

Today, Cowboy and I had one of our farmtastic adventures away from the farm.  We took a stroll through the Clifton, Texas Fall Fest, and oh my, my how it made us smile.  It was everything that makes a fall festival great, with the perfect dose of Texas tossed in. Here are our top picks for what makes a perfect fall festival.

  1. Classic car show – You guessed it.  This is one of Cowboy’s requirements, but it’s super fun to take a step back in time and dream.  There’s nothing like the style of old rides.

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  2. Live music – The trio of GypsyBelle put their harmonies to work with toe-tapping favorites and their own originals.  Young and old sat around smiling and clapping. Just plain fun.
    The GypsyBelle trio singing sweet harmonies.
  3. Corn dogs – Yep, another cowboy fave.  However, I must admit he’s turned this farmgirl into a lover of the corn dog as well.
    Corn dog with mustard and sweet tea. Mmmmm … good!
  4. Pumpkins and plants – Nothing says fall like displays of pumpkins and gourds.  Carved, painted, decorated, Charlie Brown was right, the pumpkin is simply great.
    Nothing says country fall like flowers in a basket on a stage that is a flat bed trailer. God bless small towns.
    Pumpkins, pumpkins, and more pumpkins!
  5. Beautiful old buildings – As I’ve mentioned before, I’m a sucker for a town square, and  Clifton doesn’t disappoint with their old movie theater, rows of old buildings, and even an old jail that has been turned into the Cell Block Hotel.

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  6. Crafts and vendors – Admitedly, Cowboy refers to this as the “arts and crap” portion of any festival, but I love to see what creative ideas people bring.  Today brought tons of cute wood working, jewelry, and even the amazing street artist, Martin Martinez of CosmoUniversalArt.  Folks stayed huddled around Martin all day watching him create his amazing paintings in real-time.  (Even Cowboy was fascinated.)  And to make it totally Tex-ified, the Texas Farm Bureau had their wagon out showing us all why agriculture is critical to our future.
    Local vendor selling handmade crosses. A sweet lady showing off her special wares.
    Handmade bird houses and rocking horses. Love handmade things!
    Get moo-ving and join the Texas Farm Bureau.
    Texas Farm Bureau – a reminder of how agriculture is life. They like to say if you eat, you’re involved in agriculture.

Before October escapes us, be sure to check out your the small towns where you live, and let us know your favorites.  We love to support local and small business, and that includes all things that make small towns and home towns great.

Critter Stories · Farmtastic Stories

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It’s Off to the Vet We Go

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With the herd of critters we have around the farm, going to the vet is just part of what we do. The goal of this little visit was an annual check-up and shots for Dixie Doodlebug and Goober.  However, the playful and mischievous Maybelle has never been left home alone, i.e. sans her pooch siblings.  So you guessed it, we loaded up all three for a farmtastic adventure.

Poor Cowboy drew the short straw.  Since his truck has fabric seats, it became the pooch mobile.  So we folded up the back seat in his truck, laid out the blankets and towels, and got it road worthy.  (Just FYI, as I’m sure you can probably guess, this farm mama does not approve of pooches riding in pickup truck beds.  It’s just too nerve wracking for me, and I’m convinced not the safest for our four-legged friends.)

Now the next challenge – how do you get the big guys in the truck?  Cowboy’s farm genius was in full gear, and he got out the horse steps. (For my city friends, horse steps are for shorties like me to make it easier to get on up on the equines.)  Amazingly it worked beautifully.  Goober and Dixie Doodlebug hopped up the steps and into their chariot.  Meanwhile, Maybelle had it easier as a medium-sized gal and got her princess paws lifted into the back seat.

Farm Photo - Horse steps
Cowboy’s farm genius. Horse steps to help the dogs into their doggy coach. (Cowboy’s shadow patiently waiting for me to take the photo. Pooches in the truck waiting to get out.)

All loaded up, we headed out for the short trip to the vet.  It’s about a 20 minute drive (yes, in the country that is a short trip).  Unfortunately, our fur balls can’t sit still.  All were panting and bouncing from window to window.  Maybelle, being the littlest of the bunch, found it easiest to walk under the big guys, so she had her own personal little highway for roaming back and forth.  Meanwhile, Goober thought surely there was something more interesting in the front seat and challenged Cowboy’s arm, the guard gate, for a chance to get at it.  Cowboy won.

Dog Photo - Maybelle and Goober in the truck
Woohoo! Maybelle and Goober angling for a front seat.

Once at the vet, we filed in like the circus had come to town.  At which point our wonderful vet exclaimed, “I thought you were just bringing two?”  We explained that Miss Maybelle had not been home alone, and because we wanted to come home to a sofa and doors still in tact, she had to come along for doggy moral support.  He cracked a smile and immediately understood.

Everyone checked out well and got clean bills of health.  And bonus, Dixie Doodlebug, who is a bit round and has been on a diet, lost nine pounds. Woohoo!  Now if this farm mama can just figure out how to follow suit.

Dog Photo - Dixie in the truck
Dixie Doodlebug – her new svelte self.

 

Critter Stories · Farmtastic Stories

Punky Brewster, anyone?

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Okay this post absolutely must start off with a photo.

Farmtastic Photo - Mismatched farm shoes
My customized farm shoes, a la Punky Brewster.

Yes, these are my shoes, and yes they are on my feet.  You see, these are my favorite around-the-farm tennis shoes.  However, at one point I did have one of each pair.  (I’m not totally crazy).  But alas, Maybelle strikes again.

After one of my business trips I arrived home to hear Cowboy say, “Maybelle is very sorry.  I can get you a new pair, but she was nice enough to leave you a left and a right shoe.  It was cool in the ’80s to wear two different kinds of shoes, wasn’t it?”

To which I quickly replied, “It is NOT the ’80s.”  Which, let’s just be honest, was not my best fashion decade.  I mean I had hair bows galore, among other lovelies.  So my initial thought was, “Just dandy, two more new pairs of shoes to buy.”

But then I got to thinking, “Hey, I loved Punky Brewster at one point in my life, and for the farm, these could be fun, so why not?”  Y’all do remember Punky Brewster, right?  Quirky girl in colorful clothing all mismatched and always smiling played by Soleil Moon Frye.  As usual, I digress …

Now, for those of you keeping count, Maybelle is getting close to two years old.  One would think puppyhood, or puppydom as I’ve been known to call it, would be nearing an end.  Nope.  Not for our dear, sweet Maybelle.  When we had our first cocker spaniel, Madison, I remember reading that the breed could keep their puppy-ness for up to three years and was one of the breeds that took the longest to exit puppyhood into adulthood.

Oh how I forgot about this when we brought our little Maybelle home, but oh how my shoe collection is reminding me now.  The dog can chew, chew, chew.  I feel like I keep Nylabone in business just trying to keep her mouth busy.  It’s a good thing she is about as adorable as they come.

Anyway, these are now my farm shoes.  Great for all those chores like scooping stalls, working in the flower beds, feeding horses, you name it.  The million dollar question is will I actually remember I have them on my feet when I decide to quickly hop in the car to run to town to go to the post office or grocery store?  I’m praying so, but if I know anything about how my brain works, I am destined to sport this little fashion statement at least once in public.  You’ve been warned.

P.S. – In case anyone is wondering, the shoes are Keen’s Coronado style.  The are my absolute favorites, and unfortunately these lovely fabrics aren’t available right now.  But I do keep watching for fun new ones to add. 

Farmtastic Recipes

Farmtastic Recipe – Broccoli Cheese Soup

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Yes, it’s still warm in Texas, but we are getting glimmers of fall with some cooler mornings and days that don’t make you melt. And when it comes to fall food, I absolutely love a good soup.  While Cowboy is not a soup fan, he’s more of a meat and potatoes fella (hold your shock), I think soups make great lunch time options or a quick dinner meal.  And with the shorter days of fall and farm chores to get in during daylight hours, I love something I can make on the weekend and get several meals out of during the week.

On the hunt for a great broccoli cheese soup, I let my fingers do the typing and came across a wonderful blog – The Recipe Critic.  Here are my notes on this bowl of soup that feels like a snuggly hug.

The Recipe: Panera Copycat Broccoli Cheese Soup

The Source: The Recipe Critic (click here for the official recipe)

Farmtastic Notes:

I made the soup as directed with a few little tweaks:

  • First, when making the roux, I added my salt and pepper at this step.
  • I add a touch more butter when sweating down my onions.  Admittedly this was because I was going too quickly, and misread the recipe, but it was still divine.  Butter makes everything better.
  • When it comes to broccoli, I wanted a bit more, so my thought was if 1 cup was great, 2 cups would be divine.  And just as I thought, I got yummy broccoli bits in every bite.  And while on the broccoli note, I used fresh florets chopped well.
  • Because I upped the broccoli factor, I reduced the carrots to about 1/3 of a cup, but I think 1/2 cup would have been perfect.  Also, instead of a julienne cut, I diced my carrots into small bite-size chunks.
  • For the cheese, I opted for a mild cheddar.  And if you get the finely shredded kind, it practically melts as soon as you add it to the soup.
  • Remember to keep the heat on a low simmer.  It can get steamy pretty quickly, and you don’t want the dairy to break on you.

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Overall, this soup was absolutely delicious, and is definitely going into the repertoire of wonderful fall meals. I’d love to hear what you think of this recipe, so give it a try and share your thoughts.

P.S. – In the photos, I’ve included some super cute kitchen must-haves.  Just ask Cowboy, I’m a sucker for adorable glassware and anything that makes the kitchen fun. Here’s where to find them:

  • If you like my adorable wooden spoon, it’s from ModCloth.  While they no longer carry the chirping birds, I absolutely love the fall version with a squirrel.  Just keep in mind it is a hand-wash only item.
  • The soup bowls are Fish Eddy vintage flower storage bowls. What makes these guys great is that they come with plastic lids so they are an excellent choice for fridge storage.  Measure out your soup and get it ready for the week. Also available at ModCloth. 
Critter Stories · Farmtastic Stories

Drama Donkey

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As I’ve mentioned before, this farm mama has a day job, which occasionally calls for me to be out of town. But thanks to Cowboy and family, someone is always at the farm to care for the cast of characters that call Wild Horse Valley Home.

Admittedly, the number of critters we have is due to me, and my inability to say “no” to a creature in need. And while Cowboy is an animal lover too, sometimes they just flat wear him out. Honestly, this last couple of weeks I think they have been conspiring against me to demonstrate just how much work they are.

This summer has been one of emergency vet visits for injured horses and donkeys, multiple busted stalls from bucking and playing, and Maybelle has been on a cricket bender flying around the yard and garden chasing them, eating them, and then unceremoniously throwing them up on the living room floor.   The latter has become such a problem that Cowboy has even considered that we may need to get chickens to contend with the crickets and grasshoppers. I’ll keep you posted on that potential adventure. I digress …

On my recent work trip, I got a text from Cowboy that Sweetie Pie the donkey was limping. As I prepared to speak at a media conference, I was guessing I was the only one getting texts about injured donkeys. Sometimes I feel like a girl with two personalities, high-tech product manager and poop-scooping farm girl.

Anyway, Cowboy and I quickly came up with a plan. Sweetie Pie and Mama Rose were put in the oversized stall with fresh hay and water so she could rest until we could assess the issue. (Where Sweetie Pie goes, Mama must follow.) I reminded Cowboy where the donkey and horse aspirin was to give her some relief. (Yes, there is such a thing.)

Animal Photo - Sweetie Pie the donkey soaking her hoof
This is from earlier in the summer when Sweetie Pie hurt her back hoof. This time she was not willing to soak it like a good donkey. We tried, and we had flying buckets to prove it.

After calls to the vet and farrier, we decided it was likely an abscess and scheduled the farrier to come as soon as he could make it out to us. Cowboy was on donkey duty and kept me apprised daily of how our little Pie was getting along. She was limping pitifully on her front left leg.

However, Cowboy noticed something odd. If Sweetie Pie did not see him looking at her, she moved much better. The moment he would turn and look at her, the limping would ensue with pomp and circumstance, as though her front leg was absolutely useless. Was our little donkey playing on Cowboy’s sympathies? Are they that smart? You bet your bottom dollar they are!

Finally the farrier arrived and found that Sweetie Pie had indeed injured her little hoof with a puncture wound, likely from some type of thorn she found out in the pasture. The farrier made quick work of it and opened the wound so it could drain and give her relief. However, while he said it was likely uncomfortable, he thought our little Pie was a bit of a “drama queen.” Really? You don’t say!

Just like two-legged kiddos, the four-leggeds know how to get attention with the best of them. The good news is that Sweetie Pie is on the mend, that is as long as we don’t look at her.

Farmtastic Recipes

Farmtastic Recipe – Lemonade Cake

My Farmtastic Life6 Comments

To celebrate the end of summer,  I decided to do a little baking with one of Cowboy’s absolute favorite flavors – lemon!  I came across a recipe for lemonade cake in a recent issue of Cooking With Paula Deen.  And let’s be honest, nine times out of 10 her recipes turn out yummy.  Could it possibly be the oodles of butter?  Most definitely, but for the occasional splurge, who says you can’t have a little fun?

Here are my notes on this lemony delight.

The Recipe: Lemonade Cake

The Source: Cooking With Paula Deen Magazine (click here for the official recipe)

Farmtastic Notes:

  • I made the cake exactly as directed with one exception, I only added 1/2 tablespoon of lemon zest.  My lemons were tiny, and it was all I could eek out.  It was still lemony good, so I don’t think I missed anything.
  • For the icing, I added 2 tablespoons of milk to get the consistency I wanted, as well as to take a smidge of the tartness out.
  • The finished product was quickly gobbled up at the farm.  The cake was perfect, slightly dense and super moist.  But the icing was a little sweet for me.  Admittedly, I’m a cake girl, but Cowboy is an icing guy and he gave it a thumbs up.  I think I might try it with a vanilla icing next time.
  • A couple of baking notes:
    • I buttered and floured my cake pan to prep it.  But like my mama taught me, I also cut a piece of wax paper to fit in the bottom of the pan.  This ensure it pops right out, but of course be sure to remove the wax paper!
    • When adding my eggs to the mixer, I crack them into a small mason jar and then add them to the batter.  And yes, I learned this the hard way, as I cracked an egg and all of its eggshell glory into batter once while the paddle attachment was mid mix.  And let’s face it, that just makes quick work of the eggshell, and then your entire batter is crispy, crunchy, ruined.  It’s easiest just to avoid this with a little extra step.

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I’d love to hear what you think of this recipe, so give it a try and share your thoughts.

Farm Life · Farmtastic Stories

Tiny Barn, Grateful Heart

My Farmtastic Life2 Comments

Have any of y’all heard of the tiny house movement?  The basic concept is that we have too much stuff, and that it’s time to simplify.  Reasons for going tiny are many including: financial, freeing up maintenance and effort of home ownership to travel or pursue other passions, focusing on experiences vs. things, and the list goes on.  I think the official square footage to be called tiny is 500 square feet, and as we say in the South, that is teeniny!

When Cowboy and I moved to the farm, while we upsized on land (and maintenance work, just ask any farmgirl), we downsized our living space to less than 1,000 square feet.  I remember family and friends were concerned what that would be like for us, having come from a 2,100 square foot 3-bedroom-two-bathroom ranch.  And let’s be honest, they were worried about how I would do because as long as Cowboy has a workshop, he’s all set.

I have to admit when we saw the concrete slab poured for our barn and I saw < 1,000 square feet carved out for our living space, my immediate thoughts went to, “Oh no!  What have I agreed to?”  But then I thought,  “It’s okay.  This is just temporary.  We’ll build a house in a couple of years at most.”

So I went about sorting our home into giveaways, keeps for later, and keeps for now.  We gave away A LOT.  We kept quite a bit in boxes marked “house” in hopes they would be part of our future home once we moved out of the barn.  The process was freeing as we got down to our favorite things, which were all going into the barn, and they were the things that had the most meaning to us.

Well here we are four years later, and we absolutely love living in our smaller space.  We’ve had to add on a guest room, because as I’ve said in the past the country will attract your city friends like flies to honey, upping our space to just under 1,400 square feet. But we had to find a spot to put folks because the sofa, chairs, and floors were filling up.

Anyway, this summer, we decided it was time to go through those “house” boxes, because if we hadn’t used them in four years we likely didn’t need them.  Of course, we found some treasures, and we found some others that fell into the what-were-we-thinking category.

Who knows, we might build a house someday or stay in the barn until we are old and gray and rocking away on the porch.  (I’m working on plans to screen in the porch, so that would be just cozy perfect.)  So while I’m not a member of the tiny house movement – because let’s face it, I am not a joiner,  as friends have pointed out in the past – I do like the idea of simplifying.  (Oh, and as Cowboy says we can’t have an official tiny house because where would we put all the fur-kids?  True, very true!)

So I vote we not get hung up on rules about square feet or reality TV show definitions of a movement, but we just look inside and find those moments of joy and gratefulness.  It never hurts to take an inventory of the external and internal, as we all have growing and learning to do.  And being grateful for each little thing is a great way to start.

Farm Photo - Inspirational sign, "Happiness Comes From a Grateful Heart"
One of the many signs I’ve filled up our living space with. I love inspirational sayings for little pick-me-ups.

 

 

Adventures Away From the Farm · Farmtastic Stories

Farmgirl Does Yoga

My Farmtastic Life1 Comment

As I’ve mentioned in past posts, grace is definitely not my middle name.  Cowboy could tell you stories of my many trips and falls, and over the years I’ve learned to roll with it and simply laugh.  So when I decided to take a yoga class in town, it was with excitement and a supreme willingness to laugh at myself because I knew if one thing was true, it would definitely be amusing.

Having recently had a birthday, I decided it was time to use it as a little inspiration to focus on some new healthy habits.  I’ve started walking, and thought a class or two would be fun to add to the mix.  Being that I’ve always wanted to improve my balance, yoga sounded like the perfect fit.  Again, willingness to laugh required.

So I put on the yoga pants, which by the way should only be worn to an actual yoga class or at home, grabbed the yoga mat, and headed for class.  I had absolutely no idea what to expect.  I walked into a room full of ladies of all ages, shapes, and sizes who greeted me warmly.  “Okay, maybe this won’t be so bad,” I think.

Artsy music was playing in the background with requisite chirping birds,  strings, and pan flute.  In my head, all I could think was Yanni.  (Anyone else remember him?)  Scents of lavender wafted through the air, and a Namaste sign was sitting at the front of the room.  Can you picture it?  While soothing, this also just made me giggle on the inside, as it seemed so serious for the what I knew would be exercise shenanigans for me.

I found a spot in the back of the room in the corner.  I wanted as many walls to hold onto as possible.  Heck, I probably should have been doing this in a stall of some sort.    The lights lowered and the games began.  Standing, bending, stretching, sitting, bending, standing.  “Okay, I’m not dying yet,” I think as I start to relax.  Granted, touching my toes seems like a feat for Gumby, but I’m keeping up, somewhat.

Until, we start to go faster.  We (and by we, I mean everyone else), easily flows from one position to another.  They are on their stomachs, their feet, folding like origami with their feet in front of and behind them.  Holy batman, I can’t keep up.  I’m wrestling with one leg then the other, twisting myself into a pretzel.

Okay, we’re back to standing, and I thank my lucky stars that I picked a corner.  And then it happens. That quintessential Yoga pose – standing on one leg with the other leg lifted and foot against your calf (or heaven forbid your thigh).  I weebled and wobbled and couldn’t even get my toes past my ankle or off the floor. Combined with my arm on the wall, I think I created a new move called the tripod.

On top of that, we’re breathing in and out with this move and that, and I am quite sure I am breathing in when I’m supposed to be breathing out and vice versa.  On a side note, with all this breathing in and out all I can think about is Darth Vader, and again silence myself as I want to whisper to my neighbor, “Luke, I am your father.”

Class finally comes to a close and we are all laying on our mats eyes closed, meditating or praying. I’m praying and thanking God in heaven that I did not break anything.  When suddenly with my eyes shut something drops on my face. “Let’s not panic,” I tell myself.  I inhale deeply and realize the instructor has put a cloth over my eyes that is laced with lavender – and by lavender I mean an entire field.  “Don’t breathe, don’t breathe, don’t breathe,” I tell myself.

I lay there for what feels like an eternity, and then I swear I thought I heard instructions to twist your hips and stretch.  So there I am, flopped out on my mat, eyes covered, stretching away, legs twisted, when I hear lots of shuffling.  “Oh no, maybe I’m not supposed to be doing this,” I think.

So I ease the cloth off my face and sure enough everyone else is sitting up and doing some other stretch entirely.  I blush and think, “Don’t mind me, folks.  I haven’t a clue about this stuff.  However, if you need me to scoop a horse stall I can do that like an ace.”

Class finally ends with a group “namaste,” and which point I quell my inner desire to yell, “Yehaw!”  Everyone parts with well wishes and see-ya-next-times.  And I survived.  And I’ll likely do it again.

Maybe if i do enough yoga, I’ll be able to easily balance on fence rails or even shimmy across the ice to beak up frozen water troughs this winter.  A girl can dream, can’t she?

Farmtastic Photo - Yoga mat and cowgirl boots
Photos largely omitted to protect the innocent, namely me. A farmgirl does yoga. You get the gist.

P.S. – The local instructor was super nice, gracious, and welcoming.  This experience purely speaks to my athletic prowess, or lack thereof.